I'm alive & kiciking !

After soo long.... !

Actually I forgot about the existence of this blog...
HAHAHA... faktor usia maybe?

Yeah...
what's new?

WORK
Still in the same office.. It has been roughly about 3 years now.. Alhamdulillah...

WEIGHT
this is ridiculous ! I never thought that I can be this fat ! I'm now 60kg ! Can you believe it? Urghhh -__- I hate my self. the most obvious part is my bulgy tummy ! It looks like I'm pregnant. Nevertheless I'm still not in the mood to control my food intake and exercise. hmmm

WEDDING
Finally. I can talk about wedding ! Alhamdulillah.. I have someone now... I don't know what to call him. Is he my boyfriend? Literally. HAHAHA. We have been discussing about marriage for quite some time. But then I still haven't told my mom. while he already did that. HEHE.. I just pray that he is really my jodoh.. InsyaAllah...

Okay that's all for now. Laters, baby !

result

remember this entry? today the result is out. as expected. I failed. So? I feel so upset and useless. Furthermore most of the candidates pass! T___T

I just wanna go invincible at the moment. I don't want to talk to anybody. I'm super duper down... sob sob ;(

interview?

early this year I accepted the offer from *** as a contract officer in this Ministry. I was so happy and grateful for being given this opportunity. And coming this 5/1 I have interview to attend to change my post from contract to permanent. I'm so freaking nervous! I don't know why. Dah lama tak attend interview makes me restless. Nak baca apa ni? What to expect? aaaahhhh. Kalau tak nak pergi camna? hehe ;p takut dan risauuuuuuuuu

Sometimes

I hope by looking at this picture over and over again, I'll be more grateful that I have a job! Even though am not loving it but it's still good to have one, right?

p/s : thank you for awarded me babe! and for my blog obviously you're the winner too. .:)

Eid Mubarak

salam Eid Mubarak to all & Selamat Hari Malaysia!

how's raya everyone? mine was okay. nothing more nothing less. but there's one thing that is more, i've gained more than i should! urghh. i seem can't stop munching raya cookies + rice + or any dishes made by mom. or maybe it just PMS. yes. i used to eat more when it (my menses) comes. when it comes to food i opt for more but when it comes to exercise i opt for less! that's explain clearly why i've this serious body image issue.. hmmmm. but let's put aside this never ending issue for a while. i wanna blog about other things. as my preious entry published regarding the question, yesss as expected! blerghh. it makes me sick! really. i just can't handle it anymore but can't avoid it since it came from my aunties & uncles mouth! furthermore pak ude nearly become a matchmaker! he offered me his colleague, a teacher from kedah. when he asked whether i'm interested to get to know him, i just can't answer. i don't have a heart to say yes YET! but what makes me going nuts is, my mom already started to complain today! she said what am i waiting for? why i turned down pak ude's offer, bla bla bla! omg. how can i answer that? this is definitely not 1st time me being matchmaking by others. in fact my mom had been trying to matchmake me with two guys, and obviously it dosen't work! so did my cousin. my friends and the list goes on. i just too tired for all this. i always pray for this to happen in my doa. i just hope GOD will grant this wish of mine soon ;))

question during HARI RAYA

feels like wanna quit and be a fulltime housewife. but to whom? i don't have a husband YET. i'm so sick to think about this over and over again. arghhh. this coming raya, i'm VERY sure everybody will ask the same question which i don't have the answer. wish i can answer your question but too bad its beyond my control. i better prepare a good answer for that so there will be no more question being asked later. HAHA ;p yeah i know i'm getting older but who am i to tell when am going to get married? people will say that i am too choosy or picky. but i believe in order to be choosy or picky there's must be a list to be chosen right? but taaadaaaa there's no list okay. so how come they say i am choosy? blerggghhh !!

shining 2010

i'm back!
2010 gonna be a great start for me!
i've been selected to join govt as a ptd contract (lantikan JPA)..
awesomeness~

thankful.. alhamdulillah
no words can describe my feeling..

and i lost 3 kgs~ yeah... only 5 more kg to shed.. ;)

other than that, remain the same~
daa~

long silence-090909

hey peeps...

ade yang misses me tak? hehe.
sorry for not updating...! been busy and super duper lazy!! huhu. yeah. this is not my primary blog. so i spend most of my time dekat my primary la.. which is.. http://dotdotdot.blogspot.com. haih. cannot tell la. if i tell then this blog no longer anonymous! haha.

so what i've been up to? nothing much. still the same routine... work n work.. more shopping.. put on weight.. haih.. dunno la. oh ya in my previous entry i mentioned about getting a new boyfie rite.. but it turned out i still single. i cant get along with him. baru 30mins borak kt ym yet he's getting on my nerves!

then this month is the 3rd months i've been working here. and i already started searching a new job. hehe.. mmg plan macam tu. sbb this job macam stepping stone for me. but it dosen't mean i take this job for granted. i still perform my level best.. and so far memang i pun top performer! yeay ;) i have to look for better option coz with the salary that i earn now, there's not much i can do. the basic is cukup2 for me every mth since i dnt have any commitment melainkan bg parents, ptptn and pay for my streamyx. simpan ade la sikit. and dpt shopping pon sikit. so i have to earn at least rm2k if want to have my own car. thats why i kne cr keje lain.. mintak2 tuhan murahkan rezeki.. i've been eyeing to join govt since forever.. hopefully my dream come true soon. i do really hope that 2010 gonna be my lucky year! yeah.. positive!!

ok lah.. enough rambling for today..

its not too late for me to wish all muslims

selamat menjalani ibadah puasa

&&

selamat menyambut hari raya aidilfitri


p/s: thanks dr sam for all ur comments! i really appreciate it!

indecisive

holla peeps.

was thinking to update more often here. but i'm so lazy these days.. plus tired. workplace, so far ok. well i'm not really in the right place as now in the midst of training. but fellow here is cool! me likey ;) its just a week but i felt like know them ages ago... ! and above all i've been assigned as a team leader! how cool is that? heee ;) but it comes with greater responsibilty, more works, etc..

hey if u noticed i kept babbling about how unlucky i am by not having a BF! but it's not anymore... no no no.. don't get me wrong.. i don't have any YET.. but i do have friends who wants to match me with someone, and there is a person who interested to know me better in fb and so on...
meaning there is a possibility that i'm gonna have a BF soon.. i hope so.. being me who is very shy and lack of confident, hard to find one! wish me luck people.. daa~

finally!

alhamdulillah...
i've got a JOB people! yes! after 7months struggling finding one now i've got it! it suppose to feel great to have one.. yet i feel nothing. i'm not excited as i suppose to be! what happen? okay let me tell ya
~here goes

1. money factor.. the salary is not that great.. i dont know the exact figure but it is lesser than what i used to receive when i was in cimb & during training.. but what can i say. i really need the job as if i dont care about money. i have to! tsk. :(
2. this job is not based on my qualification.. even a diploma holder can get it. i am degree holder!
3. i'm gonna work for long hours. but busy is good rite?

the rest let me keep it myself. hishhhh it was wrong to feel like this. rite?
whatever it is.. i am GRATEFUL...

i'm alone at home. hungry... n feels so miserable! tsk. dunno how to explain.

still looking for a job! can u believe it? i burst into tears at the time i write this. so pathetic! right now i feel like i want to ......! it has been more than 7 months i have no job. I am a degree holder! grade with second upper! why is it so hard for me to have a job! i've been looking for a job all over.
yet still no luck! but my friends who is only diploma holder, only went to a job interview once, n taraaa! she got the job!!! arghhhh.


malas nak taip. aku nak nangis sampai lebam nih. out.

i'm thinking....

here's the thing.

which one is the worst?

you have a fantastic job, well paid, out of country. but you lost your loved ones.

OR

you don't have a job. not even a temp. but you still got your loved ones by your side each and every day.


CAN MONEY REALLY BUY HAPPINESS?
DOES MONEY THAT REALLY MATTERS?

what do you think?

dilemma

okay now i'm in dilemma. if before this i kept thinking about working and have a boyfriend but now it change. huhu. i just discover that one of my bestie during high school is might be leaving to scotland this sept for study. suddenly i feel so envy! yeah. envious. i want to study or working OS too! i burst into tears. i feel so hopeless, again! don't know how many times i kept thinking me being such a looser! huhu. then i google about how to further study abroad. i came accross a few forums which discussed about this. but it leads me nowhere. still don't know whether i am qualified or not. i just discover that i have to take IELTS exam. i also hit british council website. and i found that if i want to do MBA i have to at least have experience. oh.. i don't know about that. i read about the requirements.. hurm.. in a nutshell i don't think i am qualified yet... I want to do MBA maybe major in finance or Islamic Banking.. but don't know yet. it only take 1 year for me to complete my MBA. so i have come to conclusion that I will do my MBA when i married! by that time i might be experienced (more than what i am now) and i have clearer picture what i want to focus on and at the same time i am more matured. Amin.

p/s: i want to do my MBA here.